Tea for Two

My mother (God rest her soul) would break out in song and dance with the slightest, or even no, provocation. She was not Adele and could sing way better than me, she could not remember all the words to most of the songs she sang, and then there was always that ‘make up words as you go along’ to fill in the blank spots…which I think she did on purpose just to annoy me.

But Tea for Two was not just any song; she gave the whole soft-shoe-tap-dance like I was watching a 1920’s vaudevillian show.

Tea for two and two for tea
Me for you, and you for me..alone!

enter the soft-shuffle with full 360 degree turn while wearing a flowered housecoat and slippers. Yes it was quite a sight.

As I would sit there and shake my head at what I was seeing and hearing, she would say, “you will miss my singing when I am gone”. I miss more things about her than I can ever count; her singing is not one of them. Maybe I need more than 5 yrs time to appreciate it.

Throwing caution into the wind when all I wanted was a damn snack

We now live in a day and age where even without allergies, you can still play Russian Roulette with a simple snack and warning labels are never a good sign.

Very very rarely do I ever actually ‘snack’ and when I do, its typically old school on the stove popcorn in a pan shacking it back and forth so it doesn’t burn… but I digress.

I wanted to change things up one night this week and bought an impulse snack because it was covered in blue cheese and jalapeño flavoring (insert Simpson drool here). Briefly looking at the package it stated no gmo, gluten free, blah blah… whatever… just give me the extra blue cheese and jalapeño, now! I mean please…ahem..

Listed on the bag, above the ingredients in very large print was a word I had not seen before: the Konjac yam. Directly underneath this unknown substance was a strongly worded phrase: Consumption of 6 oz of water per serving is recommended. Huh.

First thought in my head, “how damn hot are these things where water is recommended per serving?” (even though I know never to drink water with extremely spicy foods, you are supposed to drink milk, bread, crackers, etc. to soak up the spice, so relax people, it’s just the first thing I thought of)

So after eating my share of the snack (because my pie-hole love blue cheese and jalapeño without a second thought) I start the internet search for this mysterious ingredient only to find that not only are the side effects in big bold letters consist of BLOCKAGES OF ESOPHAGUS, THROAT OR INTESTINE, but went on to state that due to the health risk of eating this ingredient, it is banned in Canada and Australia.  Yowza!

Less of an importance, yet something that still concerning and should still be addressed was the ‘gastrointestinal distress including diarrhea and flatulence’ side effect (damn it mouth! ok how many of these things did I just eat?).

Glad I wasn’t on a hot date; lack of breathing and diarrhea/flatulence is not the sexiest look for anyone.

Consider this a P.S.A. and now you know.

Daily Post: Snacks

Fab-u-lous at 50!

its-a-birthday

The age of 50 may not seem ancient to all, but as my birthday to turn the big 5-0 was just last week, it feels ancient. It is a new decade. I am no longer in that 40-49 bracket (gasp!). Waking up in the morning creates the sounds of new pops, creaks, and snaps (and ouchies)…

I am trying to make the best of it, comes to terms with it, and thankfully Goose threw me a birthday party to remind me, things are not all that bad…maybe I am not as old, decrepit, and ancient as I tend to think. She rented an enormous house-6 bedrooms, 3 bath, and a third floor ballroom!! (courtesy of my Pop wish he could have attended…), I was surrounded by amazing friends (who drove upwards of two hrs to celebrate with me), laughs all weekend long (ever played the game “cards against humanity? say no more), won $$ at roulette (yes!) and danced the night away (no hokey-pokey here). I am not sure if it gets any better than that.

victoria-me

What would I do without my Goose? An amazing young woman who goes above and beyond for those she loves. I would be lost without her.

cheers!

cheers!

Cheers to another year! Thanks Mom – wish you were here – you would have shown the gang a few moves, at the expense of throwing out a hip! God Bless you!

The value of time? Priceless.

There are many things we cannot put a price on; love, trust, time…especially time… The value is priceless – it is just that simple.

goose

My daughter’s laugh; priceless (and contagious)

There is just not enough time for us to have fun together; we always want more.

If I could pay for more time with her, I would surely rob a bank.

just-dirt

finished

close-up

We paint, we plant, we indoor skydive, we vacation, we explore, we adventure…never enough time… value of time is priceless.

Happy Birthday Cake (?!)

HappyBirthday?

I would love to give credit to the person with the creativity, wit, and imagination who made this grim laugh for me, but alas I cannot.

The big 5-0 is upon me and at the moment it is a double edged sword. I can look back with pride and many smiles to all my accomplishments, travels, and an amazing daughter, but at the same time, count the days/months/years that I have left to enjoy those that remain.

No longer am I ‘middle aged’ – I am clearly on the downward side of that hill without the appropriate gear to keep me from breaking bones and living far longer than I could (and should!).

bubble

Maybe I should invest in a plastic bubble like Jake G!! It has potential, right? anyone? ::crickets::

(this post is in response to the Daily Post prompt)

Quirky habits are not finger licking good

We all have quirky habits, and typically we don’t even know about them until they are brought to our attention. Case in point: apparently with every bite of food I take, I tap the utensil thrice (not once, not twice… but thrice…you saw that coming right?) before bringing it to my mouth. I was completely oblivious to this fact until my very astute boyfriend brought it to my attention.  I caught myself doing it and realized it was a subconscious effort to keep any droplets or loose food from falling off my utensil while on its way up to my pie hole.

Some may find that endearing while others may want to stab themselves in the eye with a rusty fork; to each his own.

Quirky habit of my boyfriend which I find completely hysterical and endearing at the same time is watching him flip out when he sees someone lick their fingers before separating the plastic grocery bags or better yet when the food prep person licks their fingers to separate the sheets before placing a sandwich on it. He completely loses his mind, looks me straight in the eye and says, ‘why don’t they just spit directly on my food, it’s the same God damn thing’….only this goes on for about 10 minutes as I try to hold back my laughter and sympathize at the same time. He has an excellent point it just doesn’t bother me the same way.

plastic bag

Have a nice day? Not if you lick your fingers before touching my grocery bag!

This post is in response to the prompt of the day:

Quirk of Habit

Which quirky habit annoys you the most, and what quirky habit do you love — in yourself, or others

Indoor Skydiving Anyone??

giselleflyingNever did I think I would step out of my comfort zone for this type of ‘adventure’ but at the same time, I do like to try something new; paradox, right? So time for an Adventures in the Mini segment – bring it on!

toriaflying

What is indoor skydiving? A large indoor vent/fan pushes you upward with I have no idea how many psi. But it must be a whole lot because it can push you 20 or so feet in the air.  

After check in, there is a short class on hand signals from the instructor (chin up, relax, legs straighter or bent) to fly more evenly. They forgot to mention ‘tighten up your core and you shoot straight up’. I learned that very quickly and was close to out of reach with the instructor jumping to bring me to back to ‘controlled’.

At that moment I had a Charlie moment from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Faculty – Charlie moves skyward from swallowing too many bubbles from the new drink. Up I flew and laughed so hard I was drooling… no picture… not that I would post it if I had one.

It is a very similar feeling to skydiving without the 10,000 feet fall (and the prayers to please allow the shoot to open).

I strongly recommend you trying it. I have always wanted to fly and this is the close I will ever get to it.

A post for Adventures in the Mini but also fits the category in the Daily Post: Beyond the Pale: When was the last time you did something completely new and out of your element? How was it? Will you do it again?